Where Are and What About Plus Size Men?

(NB- This video is 23 minutes long but believe me if you have the time this is completely worth it!)

I must admit this has puzzled me for some time.  The plus size world and industry has grown so fast in recent years but seems dominated by women?  It felt like perhaps plus size men kind of didn't get the same abuse as plus size women and that they got a sort of free pass because they were men?  There is so much available now for plus size women but I have not come across much if anything for plus size men.  I know they exist.  But I kept wondering why they were so quiet?  Do they have a voice?  Do they share the same problems?  I didn't know.  The plus size industry is so geared at women it seemed to suggest that women had the 'bigger' problem.  I think we should be careful at just how much is being thrown at plus size women anyway.  Where there is a marketing dream there is potential for us to be manouvered into a completely different direction than what we hoped for ourselves to begin with. Let us not fool ourselves.  The Marketing machine is a big monster that will one day eat you up!   Also I hate when anything starts being called industry anyway which really matters to me because it means that things are  being 'manufactured' to be productive.  Including allowing 'industries' to manufacture how we should think and feel.  You need only look at how even within the plus size world there is division in plus side of plus world.  This is caused by the 'industry'.  I still don't see many images of women my size.   I'm a size 28-30 (UK).  I see people who are at most size 18.  I'm estatic when I see people my size because then I can relate.  Already the industry refuses to reflect an image of all plus size women and are influencing us on what is acceptable even within the plus size world. So much so we are all one yet I've had a 'fat' girl laugh at me in the street?!  She was plus size but she was criticising an how much more plus size I was?! The mind boggles.  But society has started to divide us this way.  The ancient rule of divide and conquer.  Be careful.   This is what the plus size industry can do unless we keep it on the straight and narrow holding it to the integrity it should have.  We really must be careful we have not exchanged one 'prison' for another and remain true to ourselves and our feelings.  Is this what big men are doing I thought?  Were they refusing to buy into the hype?  Why are they so quiet?  It baffled me. 

So I trawled the internet to find some views from plus size men and it was difficult to find any coherent commentators until I cam across this guy in the video above.  He was responding to the youtube post of another guy who to me spoke absolute rubbish, was crass and above all disollusioned and ignorant.  That guy spoke with such authority and while I'll admit some of what he said was plausible I could not see past the vanity in his delivery.  Here is the link to it if you really want to watch it however bne strongly advised and warned there is an excess amount of foul language throughout http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ho9k4tlqcZQ 

The guy in the video at the top above was humble and genuine.  His views echoed mine in so many places I felt I had to share it.  So you can hear from a plus size man how life is just as tough for him living plus size in a community that likes to fat shame.  I realised me as a plus size women and he as a plus size man have similar issue.  They can't be exact because we are different genders however the majority of issues are similar and it was refreshing to hear them from a man's perspective.  We are plus size people before we are just plus size women and men.  Our issues are similar.   The difference is there doesn't seem to be much of a platform for plus size men to speak from?  Or it could be I have just completely missed the boat and there are tons.  Could be folks.  If so please excuse me.  It just doesn't seem as obvious for some reason.  Maybe it's because they don't want to stand out.  I don't know.  But I know a plus size man in the town I lived at last and I know he definitely has the same problems but seems shy about relaying these publicly the way I do.  I do because I reached an epiphany one day where I realised I am who I am.  I still smart when people are horrible.  I still shed tears.  I still have to fight to be considered intelligent and capable in my job but the difference is I don't join in.  Where I can I educate and where I have to I stand my ground!  They don't like it.  Ohhhh they don't like it.  But how else am I going to be me?  My fat my plus size male friend is gaining strength now from the  things I share with him and realising his true worth.  Remember the problem isn't that we are not adequate it is that we are so much so.  People think they need to keep us down.  Personally I want to see a plus size world that represents all members of its community across the globe.  Men, women and help for parents with teens and children.  I still want to hear from plus size communities and people from across the globe.  I'm determined to hear from you.   Look out for me.  I'll be dropping you an email any time soon.    Would also love to hear from any plus size men willing to open up and share.

So yes, there are plus size men and they do have issues like us.  Maybe we plus size women need to shift up, budge up and make a little room for them to join our plus size world.  The plus size world must be inclusive not divisive.  If we end up just mirror images of the 'normal' world then we have not done well people.  Nelson Mandela RIP, could have exacted revenge on his torturers when he had the chance but in order to show he was a better person than them all along he did something different.  We need to do the same.

Remember we want a plus size community not just a plus size industry!   

Stay beyoutiful bigYoutifuls!

RayRay xx